A client told me they experienced broken heart syndrome in the middle of divorce proceedings. Sitting in court looking at her soon-to-be ex-husband alongside his soon-to-be next wife. Taken by ambulance to the hospital, it was a suspected heart attack. It looked the same, felt the same...until the doctors informed her that it was an emotional heart attack. She said the last thought before her heart shrieked was that all her dreams were dying in a crowded courtroom with no one there that cared about her. Beautiful writing Amber. Loved this one.
I went through a very similar experience. Years ago at my yearly gyno exam the dr said she thought I had an irregular heartbeat. Turned out to be nothing, but ever since I am very much in tune.
Love your heart-opening explorations of your heartbeats and heartspace 🫀 I adore Brian Doyle's brave creative voice (RIP) and his collection of essays, "The Wet Engine: Exploring the Mad Wild Miracle of Heart."
~ "Every creature on earth has approximately two billion heartbeats to spend in a lifetime. You can spend them slowly, like a tortoise, and live to be two hundred years old, or you can spend them fast, like a hummingbird, and live to be two years old."
I had been starting my day with coffee to rev me up and alcohol at night to lull me to sleep for several years, with little to no water during the day. My blood was turning to sludge. One night I was programming a spreadsheet which will hold my attention for hours if I let it. This particular night, I let it. After four hours at my computer, I got up to bring some wood in to stoke a fire. While I was chopping some kindling, I noticed a tingling in my heart and on my tongue with a peculiar taste and smell. I have heard that heart attacks can be accompanied with such symptoms, but me? Have a heart attack? I had played ice hockey for 14 years and still relatively active foraging for firewood and maintaining the homestead. After I got the fire going, I contemplated going to bed which is my standing order fix-all when I'm not feeling 100%. I opted to go to the living room where my roommate was watching television to see if she would notice any visual symptoms. By this time, I had started yawning, frequently. (My body was involuntarily clamoring for oxygen.) She did not notice anything except that I was sitting in the living room not engaged in the tv, but not really doing anything else. I made eye contact with her and said, "I think I'm having a heart attack," in the same cadence with the Joe Gideon character from my favorite movie, All That Jazz, with less drama. I didn't want to overreact, but I didn't want to underreact, either, if my self-diagnosis was correct. I decided to go to the hospital. Where was a hospital that had an adequate cardiac program? Eek! While she drove, I'm researching on my phone for directions. En route, the urge to vomit prompted us to pull over twice. False alarms. We got to the hospital emergency drive-thru. She went in to get some help and a wheel chair. I felt silly sitting in the car while waiting when my legs still felt ambulatory, so I went into the intake area, was met with the chair, so I sat in it, it was wheeled four-feet and pivoted around so I could, on my own power, climb onto the stretcher. I was pushed another four-feet where I was met with the team, hooked up to EKG leads and assessed my lower left chamber was not showing activity. A small incision gained them access to the vain at my inner thigh and the doctor had to make two trips with the thing to suck out the clot. If not for the plaque already collected at the entrance to that chamber, I would have been done. Ironic, eh? When I was at my computer, I had my ankles crossed and pressed firmly together giving time for my sludge to congeal. Getting up to start the fire, released the clot to its destination. Listen to your body. It might have something to say.
I had to wear a heart monitor for 30 days 24/7 after my mini-stroke (TIA) in January. Every five days I had to recharge the monitor, plus I had to carry their cellphone with me everywhere I went.
They found nothing. I hope the same for you. I found it to be a nutty nuisance. (That’s just me… 🤭)
The day you wrote this was my 2 nd day of wearing a heart monitor as well! I so appreciate your observations, mine were similar. My biggest takeaway was that I realized I’ve been waiting around for someone to gently take care of my heart for my whole life, I see now it’s my job to do the care taking.♥️
My mom was diagnosed with AFib a few years ago, she just had heart surgery last July and is back in sinus rhythm! I’ve never thought so much about our physical hearts up until then, what magnificent and wonderful beasts they are. This was so beautifully written, really tugged at the “heart strings” 😊
One of my favorite focus attention practices ( ~30’ seconds for my kinders and ~60 seconds for adults ) is
“The Hand Over Heart Practice”
Place your hand over your heart so that you feel the warmth of your hand against your chest. Breathe gently and deeply while focusing on the warmth of your hand over your heart. Breathe in while welcoming a sense of ease, safety, and goodness.
Im so thrilled that your big, beautifully broken heart (kintsugi style!) is WELL. Isn’t it kind of miraculous how our physical and figurative hearts are so inextricably connected? Love healing a broken heart IS magic. 🪄 ✨
Beautifully written, Amber. I love hearing that you and your precious daughter played robot. I especially liked the last paragraph. You are big hearted in every way.
So glad you are okay and that you have a doctor that listens to you! I'm on the search again for one of those myself.
It’s the hearts like yours that need a lot of love .
A client told me they experienced broken heart syndrome in the middle of divorce proceedings. Sitting in court looking at her soon-to-be ex-husband alongside his soon-to-be next wife. Taken by ambulance to the hospital, it was a suspected heart attack. It looked the same, felt the same...until the doctors informed her that it was an emotional heart attack. She said the last thought before her heart shrieked was that all her dreams were dying in a crowded courtroom with no one there that cared about her. Beautiful writing Amber. Loved this one.
Woah! What a story!
I went through a very similar experience. Years ago at my yearly gyno exam the dr said she thought I had an irregular heartbeat. Turned out to be nothing, but ever since I am very much in tune.
🩷🩷🩷
I'm glad to hear that it wasn't anything very serious. It sounds like a fascinating experience to have to deal with something like that.
So glad that you're okay--that's the most important thing!!
I was told that I had an irregular heartbeat about 17 or 18 years ago. Turned out that it was just stress, thankfully!
Glad you’re okay! 🙏❤️
Enjoy the breakup playlist I have been SLAMMING as I navigate the worst romantic heartbreak I have felt…ever? https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/lately/pl.u-Zmbl3zrtZvP5KW
Love your heart-opening explorations of your heartbeats and heartspace 🫀 I adore Brian Doyle's brave creative voice (RIP) and his collection of essays, "The Wet Engine: Exploring the Mad Wild Miracle of Heart."
~ "Every creature on earth has approximately two billion heartbeats to spend in a lifetime. You can spend them slowly, like a tortoise, and live to be two hundred years old, or you can spend them fast, like a hummingbird, and live to be two years old."
I had been starting my day with coffee to rev me up and alcohol at night to lull me to sleep for several years, with little to no water during the day. My blood was turning to sludge. One night I was programming a spreadsheet which will hold my attention for hours if I let it. This particular night, I let it. After four hours at my computer, I got up to bring some wood in to stoke a fire. While I was chopping some kindling, I noticed a tingling in my heart and on my tongue with a peculiar taste and smell. I have heard that heart attacks can be accompanied with such symptoms, but me? Have a heart attack? I had played ice hockey for 14 years and still relatively active foraging for firewood and maintaining the homestead. After I got the fire going, I contemplated going to bed which is my standing order fix-all when I'm not feeling 100%. I opted to go to the living room where my roommate was watching television to see if she would notice any visual symptoms. By this time, I had started yawning, frequently. (My body was involuntarily clamoring for oxygen.) She did not notice anything except that I was sitting in the living room not engaged in the tv, but not really doing anything else. I made eye contact with her and said, "I think I'm having a heart attack," in the same cadence with the Joe Gideon character from my favorite movie, All That Jazz, with less drama. I didn't want to overreact, but I didn't want to underreact, either, if my self-diagnosis was correct. I decided to go to the hospital. Where was a hospital that had an adequate cardiac program? Eek! While she drove, I'm researching on my phone for directions. En route, the urge to vomit prompted us to pull over twice. False alarms. We got to the hospital emergency drive-thru. She went in to get some help and a wheel chair. I felt silly sitting in the car while waiting when my legs still felt ambulatory, so I went into the intake area, was met with the chair, so I sat in it, it was wheeled four-feet and pivoted around so I could, on my own power, climb onto the stretcher. I was pushed another four-feet where I was met with the team, hooked up to EKG leads and assessed my lower left chamber was not showing activity. A small incision gained them access to the vain at my inner thigh and the doctor had to make two trips with the thing to suck out the clot. If not for the plaque already collected at the entrance to that chamber, I would have been done. Ironic, eh? When I was at my computer, I had my ankles crossed and pressed firmly together giving time for my sludge to congeal. Getting up to start the fire, released the clot to its destination. Listen to your body. It might have something to say.
I had to wear a heart monitor for 30 days 24/7 after my mini-stroke (TIA) in January. Every five days I had to recharge the monitor, plus I had to carry their cellphone with me everywhere I went.
They found nothing. I hope the same for you. I found it to be a nutty nuisance. (That’s just me… 🤭)
Much luck to you - good health is a blessing.
The day you wrote this was my 2 nd day of wearing a heart monitor as well! I so appreciate your observations, mine were similar. My biggest takeaway was that I realized I’ve been waiting around for someone to gently take care of my heart for my whole life, I see now it’s my job to do the care taking.♥️
My mom was diagnosed with AFib a few years ago, she just had heart surgery last July and is back in sinus rhythm! I’ve never thought so much about our physical hearts up until then, what magnificent and wonderful beasts they are. This was so beautifully written, really tugged at the “heart strings” 😊
One of my favorite focus attention practices ( ~30’ seconds for my kinders and ~60 seconds for adults ) is
“The Hand Over Heart Practice”
Place your hand over your heart so that you feel the warmth of your hand against your chest. Breathe gently and deeply while focusing on the warmth of your hand over your heart. Breathe in while welcoming a sense of ease, safety, and goodness.
Im so thrilled that your big, beautifully broken heart (kintsugi style!) is WELL. Isn’t it kind of miraculous how our physical and figurative hearts are so inextricably connected? Love healing a broken heart IS magic. 🪄 ✨
Beautifully written, Amber. I love hearing that you and your precious daughter played robot. I especially liked the last paragraph. You are big hearted in every way.